Uncertainty

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by Anne Bridges

Back in March, my husband started working from home due to coronavirus. We were thankful that decision had been made and that, for the most part, things were status quo for us. Then, in April, he found out (by accident) that he was getting furloughed. Cue some initial anger, bitterness, fear … you name it – we were feeling it.

I immediately started looking at where we could make changes in our budget (which of our bills could be renegotiated to get better rates) and I started to panic a little. We were now in the waiting game, wondering if he would still have a job when things started to reopen. Employees started to return to his office but he was informed his furlough would continue. Not a good sign. We were ready for a decision to be made.

About two and a half weeks into his furlough, he was called in and told he was being laid off. By then, we had anticipated this was going to happen but it did not make it any easier to accept.

Now, we are waiting for unemployment to process and waiting to see what opportunity will be the best for our family. Will we still be here? Will we have to move? How long will we be waiting? What will school look like in August? How long can we financially manage before we have to make some major decisions? These are all the things that have been weighing heavily on me.

The Lord has graciously given me a husband who reminds me that God promises to take care of us. It might look different than what I would plan, and may not happen when I want it to happen, but He will take care of us. It will be better than what I could plan. It never seems to fail that what I’m reading in scripture – or even the devotions I do with our kids – directly relates to our current circumstances. It could be about God’s promises, his knowledge of our fears/anxiety/worries, or waiting on the Lord and having a quiet heart.

Matthew 6:25 says:

Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?

Throughout this time, we have seen provision in many ways – unexpected financial gifts, greater patience with each other, recognizing that being laid off freed us from a place that was not the best environment. I’m still annoyed about how everything happened, but my heart is changing. I am learning to rest in the knowledge that we have a Father who cares for us and that provision doesn’t always look like what I expect. I am beginning to see this time of uncertainty as a time to strengthen my faith and grow as a wife and mom.

My prayer is, that as we walk through this uncertain and unknown time, our kids will see parents who trust confidently in the Lord during difficult times.

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